Diary #2- An Artist's Reality

I don't know how to tell you that you should care about people. I'd rather show you, but even doing that I fail at times. I don't know how to tell you that we are all connected or that the consequences of actions taken are chaotic because you can't always get what you want from a roulette as random as life. What I can show you through art and collective work is that progress is not always linear and that rest is imperative to actual progression. 

Growing up my mom ALWAYS quoted scripture or parables. In my wisened youth, I remember these words in times of duress. This time the sentences echoing in my head are about staying power. "I returned and saw under the sun that— The race is not to the swift, Nor the battle to the strong, Nor bread to the wise, Nor riches to men of understanding, Nor favor to men of skill; But time and chance happen to them all." (Ecclesiastes 9:11)

And chances sometime SUCK! 

I tested positive for Covid thursday of our first techweek for Ragtime. Thankfully, I was able to lean heavily on my crew and staff to keep the ship running. And by that time, the cast was already in full swing of getting used to added elements. 

But while I was doing my best to recover and not ruminate on how the production and all affiliated were in danger, I could not help but think about the show and how much we still needed to get done. Furthermore, I thought about my life obligations. Work, prior commitments, and my own mental health kept circling back to me on shuffle and repeat. I burned through almost half of my sick time, I needed to clean the place I was able to isolate at, and there was also the question of all the deadlines that needed to be done.

Luckily, I am in a position where I can take some time off to rest. I also have the capability to lean on my teammates to help us accomplish our goals. This is not the best case scenario for any artist, but because I am supported it isn't the worst either. Many creative professionals across the country find themselves in a position like this often where they have to choose between responsible resting or pushing themselves (and the risks) to the highest possible degree. It is a shame that we, the people who work so hard for an industry that brings beauty and catharsis to our collective worlds are often put in positions where we do not have what we need to thrive or survive comfortably.

This is why paying artists and creatives is important. This is our bread and butter, the main way we sustain ourselves and our families. Please credit your artists as much as you can and always compensate them. The art that you see takes practice, skill, and refinement. There is countless hours of effort being put in to what you consume.